My Saturday night:

As being in RD means living with the Mother again, I was invited to her company's Christmas party. And because most everybody with whom she works has young children, they have a family-friendly Christmas party. Have I mentioned that I'm 15 years older than the next oldest child? Have I also mentioned that I'm really not comfortable while surrounded by small children? Oh yeah, welcome to my Saturday night:

Scene: We've just come from a nice, noisy supper at Boston Pizza (RD is so classy), and are now 5-pin bowling. There were enough people for us to fill three lanes: a lane of good bowlers, a lane of children, and a lane of not-so-good bowlers. Ya know, to surround the children and make sure they don't throw the balls overhanded (of the 5 children, 4 were boys). I'm waiting for my turn to bowl, and laughing at the shenanigans the boy children are getting in to.

5 y/o girl child to me: What kind of phone is that?
Me: It's an iPhone. (I know her mom has one, so I knew she'd know what it was.)
Girl Child: Do you have any games for kids on it? (This is a common question I get from children.)
L: No, I don't have any games at all on it right now, sorry.
GC: But you can get games for kids, don't worry.
L: Yup, I guess I can.
GC: So how many kids do you have?
L:  I don't actually have any kids. (I'm not really blindsided by this comment, as most children I've met just assume that all adults have children.)
GC: Oh. So you just have a husband?
L: Nope. No husband, no kids. Just me right now.
GC: Oh. So you just have a cousin, then?
L: (laughs incredulously and hysterically inside, tries not to burst out laughing) Yup. Just a cousin.

And then she went to go bowl. Seriously, the whole exchange lasted probably just over a minute and was witnessed by none of the other 14 people who were within 10 feet of us. The only thing I could do at the time was just shake my head.



Happy Christmas everyone, from my cousin and me!