I've been feeling really reflective lately, mostly about life and how much a year can change one person and how much one person can change in a year.

Last year, I had just turned 18, I was still in high school and still working almost full-time hours trying to save money for University, which I was planning on attending this year. I was teaching Sunday School every sunday and still desperately trying to make myself be the image I was portraying to the world. I didn't know the best friends a person could have and I had never even heard of Camp Evergreen. I felt all alone in the world, helping my best friend prepare for her upcoming wedding. I had just moved with my mom into a new house and I hated it. I suddenly had to depend on her for almost everything again. I didn't drive (still don't), and she drove me to school and work every day for the rest of the year. I hated it. I still do. I wanted to escape to Saskatchewan and just be one of Kinasao's staff members just like I had been the summer before. I knew I hated counseling, but I had figured that I could work in the kitchen or somewhere else that was behind the scenes. If I knew then what I know now, I'm not sure if I'd repeat everything just as I had. But I know that, throughout everything that's happened in the past year, I wouldn't change my time at Evergreen for anything. I learned so much about myself and met some of the best people I've ever known. I always thought the worst thing that could ever happen to me was if someone knew my secrets. I'd been betrayed more than once before and I thought that if I just kept my life to myself, nothing bad could happen to me. I was a robot. I learned how to not let my emotions affect me through almost eight years of emotional and psychological abuse. (Don't get me wrong here, I'm not playing the victim or waving a Martyr Stick, I'm simply writing what's in my head.)

I've been thinking lately if staying at the office where I currently work would be the best thing for me, and much to the dismay of a few people I work with, I've decided that it's not. It's a great job and the people are (for the most part) really great.